Dear Pavan, This indeed is a marvelous job. However, I have some commnets on the same which are attached in a scanned copy. In case there is any difficulty with my writing I am also listing out the key comments below (for ease of reference the points below have the same numbering as given in the scanned copy): Under the heading ‘Did you Know that’: 1. It is advisable to have the list of countries for ease of reference to the reader who is not aware about the APRALO jurisdiction. 2. “?” typo error. 3. Instead of “have” it should be “can make” thus the revised line will read as follows: “As a member of APRALO, you *can make* a direct impact on the directions of …” Under the heading ‘What is APRALO’: 4. Where the reference to civil society has been made it should be explained through some examples and the following phrase should be added *“such as consumer rights group, legal bodies / professional groups, government nonprofit organizations etc*“ (this list is suggestive and non exhaustive so the group members are free to suggest changes to the same if any). 5. I suggest there should be a *link *to the page where the list of all ALSes already registered with APRALO is given, after the word “Sydney”. 6. To conclude the topic on what is APRALO we should add the following line: “*If you are a group/individual or body interested in more actively participating in ICANN decision making you can either find an ALS (already registered) which caters to our interest or region or alternatively form a new ALS and register the same with APRALO.* To find more log on to http://www.apralo.org..... ” Under the heading ‘APRALO diversity’: 7. What about other activities and working groups? 8. In the opening para I would like to suggest the insertion of the phrase “*Indian sub continent and*” before the phrase “Australasia in the south” Would be happy to discuss. Please confirm the receipt of this email. Regards, Nirmol K Agarwal Chair ISVK-India (www.jurisonline.in) On Fri, Jun 11, 2010 at 6:51 AM, Pavan Budhrani <pavan@registry.asia> wrote:
Hi All,
This is the APRALO brochure final draft, any comments? If not, we will be sending it for printing for the Brussels event, Thanks, will wait until the end of the day today for comments.
Pavan
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